"My Girlfriend Talks To Other Guys": 14 No-Nonsense Tips If That's You (2023)

My girlfriend is talkative.

He is so outgoing that sometimes I have a hard time telling if he is flirting or just being friendly.

But the number of guys she talks to worries me.

And I have some advice for my compatriots on this very subject...

"My Girlfriend Talks to Other Guys": 14 Nonsense Tips When It's You

1) slowly and steadily

When your girlfriend talks to other guys, you have to be careful.

Many men make a common mistake that ends the relationship right away.

When they find out his girlfriend is talking to other guys...

You get scared.

You get irritated.

They lash out with accusations, paranoia, and possessiveness.

Don't be these guys.

Go calmly and firmly. Find out early on and don't jump to conclusions.

Your girlfriend may talk to other guys online and offline, but that doesn't necessarily mean she's cheating on you or thinking about cheating.

It also doesn't necessarily mean she's tired of you or trying to make you jealous.

Then again, that means once in a while.

Or it could also mean that there are big mistakes in your relationship that are about to tear you apart.

You need to know what to do and when to do it if you don't want to rush or react too late.save your relationship.

Let's get started then...

2) Talk to her

Then do this:

If your girlfriend talks to a lot of other guys, talk to her.

I know what to say to youAmigaIt's not always as easy as it looks, and the idea of ​​talking about a certain subject can be quite uncomfortable.

But still I encourage you to try.

Whatever the level of communication in your relationship, I'm sure it could be better.

And the first way to do better is to open your mouth.

Nonetheless:

Think before you speak. Be sure to express your concerns in an appropriate and non-accusatory manner.

It often works best to tell her that you miss talking to her and that you've been feeling distant lately.

Invite her to dinner:

Tell him how much he means to you.

Talk about your fears and dreams.

Don't just become one of those guys she talks to, but once again, become the guy she talks to a lot more than anyone else.

But how can you communicate with her if you don't know what to say?

I know how you feel Actually, a while ago I was struggling to talk to a girl I also liked.

But then I found a professional relationship coach who helped me understand how to behave naturally when it comes to communicating with the people you're attracted to.

A certified trainer I spoke with helped me a lotinsightful, specific and practical advice on how to deal with problems in my relationship.

This included real solutions to improve many things my partner and I struggled with for years.

So, if you too want a personalized guide on how to talk to your girlfriend, here's how:

Click to start.

3) Who are these "guys"?

As for the last point, believe me, I understand:

Becoming the most important conversation partner is not always a realistic goal.

There could be many reasons why she is looking for social opportunities away from you. It doesn't mean I'm done with you or your relationship is over.

It could be something much smoother or more contextual.

But an important thing to keep in mind here is who exactly these guys you're talking to are.

Is it co-workers, strangers on your phone, male friends you have the most contact with lately?

Are they people from groups she participates in, such as sports, religious, or spiritual gatherings?

They may be members of activist and social groups that she engages with in causes close to her heart.

All this is very important.

Because if you take a look at who these guys are, you'll get a much better idea of ​​why he enjoys talking to them so much.

4) How long have you been talking to them?

Another factor to consider is how long you've been talking to these "other guys".

A friend of mine recently complained about his chatty girlfriend.

"My girlfriend talks to other guys all the time, man," he told me. "I don't want to be jealous, but he's starting to miss me."

Did you know?

I understand, really.

I think there are times when arelationshipThis means that you shouldn't be so socially open with everyone you meet, especially potential alternatives for your partner.

You also have to look at it realistically.

And if you look at how long you've been talking to these people, you'll also get that much closer to evaluating the next question.

If it's been a month or two, then the "inciting incident" or personal change that led you to a more active social life probably occurred recently...

If it takes longer, they might just be lifelong friends you've been talking to for years and you just met recently.

It makes a big difference.

5) Why are you talking to them?

Now we come to the question of why you talk to these guys so much.

There are general reasons here, and that includes reasons why you might be jealous, as well as normal, healthy ones.

• Boys have similar interests to her.
• Boys have employment or career opportunities.
• Boys are old friends who are important to him.
• Boys are men she likes to flirt with.
• Boys are men she wants to have sex with.
• Guys are people you've had sex with before.
• she thinks you're boringand want entertainment
• He thinks you are very serious and wants to laugh.
• She is worried and wants comfort, which she thinks you cannot give.
• She worries about showing weakness in front of you, but there are men she's more comfortable with when she's vulnerable.
• She doesn't think you're romantic enough and wants men to show interest in her.

As you can see, there are many reasons why your girlfriend talks to other men, not all of them are bad.

But why it is, gives a great clue as to what you can do about it.

For example, if she feels bored with you or if you're not paying enough attention to her, there's an easy solution.

But when she's talking to other guys because she wants to have sex with them, then it gets a lot more complicated.

6) Have you cheated in the past?

Next, we need to take a quick look at your girlfriend's dating resume.

Do you have a history of cheating?

Think of it like a criminal background check when someone is hired for a new job.

I wouldn't hire a kleptomaniac to guard a bank vault or an opiate addict to work in the quality control department of an opiate manufacturer.

Likewise, you wouldn't trust a friend to have a contact list of 200 guys on her phone that she texts all day if she's been cheated on in the past.

It's really that easy.

The crazy thing is:

Many men treat a trusted girlfriend as if she were already a cheater!

Don't do it, it will go wrong and it might even make you thinkunfaithfulif he hadn't thought of it before.

7) Do a heat check

How jealous do you feel that your girlfriend talks to other guys?

Let's be specific:

Please rate on a scale of 1 to 10, 10 being the most jealous someone can be without becoming genuinely unstable or violent.

If you score more than 5 points, you must ask yourself a very simple question.

Is your jealousy justified or not?

If you don't know exactly who you're talking to or why, you need to see how they answer your reasonable questions about who you're talking to at all times.

As long as you ask respectfully, there's no real reason why your girlfriend shouldn't at least tell you who she's talking to at all times.

For example, if you see him getting too close to a colleague and you worry that he is going beyond mere networking...

You have the right to ask something like:

"So it looks like you and Sam hit it off at work, huh?"

It doesn't have to be an accusatory question, but you can ask it, and there's no real reason why she should be so uncomfortable talking to a guy at work about your friendship.

If so, she must tell you. And you shouldn't be jealous.

8) Share your specific concerns with them

But what if you are sure that he is not cheating on you and is getting along with you through his boyfriend or his friends?

And you're still jealous?

This gets a little more complicated.

because this is the truthemotional betrayalit's a real thing, absolutely.

And if you feel like he's emotionally betraying you and opening his heart more to other guys than to you, it can really hurt.

It doesn't matter if your girlfriend undresses for someone else or not.

You may be jealous of the affection, time, and energy you devote to other men.

And I feel very uncomfortable explaining this to him without sounding insecure or scary.

It's important to be specific about your concerns.

Explain what bothers you and why. Avoid blaming anyone. Just explain your perspective and be prepared to listen to your friend about her perspective.

9) Remember: your girlfriend is not yours

I don't know what relationship you have with your girlfriend.

What I do know is that love is often associated with possessiveness and the idea of ​​"owning" or "having" someone.

This idea seems romantic on the surface, but in reality it is deeply interdependent andpoisonous.

You don't own your girlfriend and she doesn't own you.

You are in a voluntary romantic relationship that you have chosen.

If she decides to leave you or let you down for another man: That's terrible. Seriously, it looks awful and I don't expect you to like it.

But the choice is yours.

As Angelina Gupta writes:

"Whatever the reason, remember to deal with feelings of jealousy and insecurity in a healthy way. Otherwise, you could poison your relationship.

"The issues you have with yourself can play out in your relationship and create an unhealthy dynamic."

When dealing with the problem of your girlfriend talking to too many other men, remember that her behavior is up to her.

You can tell him where you are and tell him your boundaries like you should.

The rest is up to her.

Which brings me to my next point:

10) Don't overdo it

It is important to emphasize the danger of overreaction. Burying and repressing your frustration or jealousy isn't a good idea either.

But whatever you do, don't overdo your girlfriend's social life.

It doesn't have to end well.

If you want your girlfriend to respond to your concerns, you need to do so in a mature and rational way.

It's okay to have concerns about your conversations with guys.

But try focusing on how he makes you feel, or open-ended questions about who his various friends are and why he likes them.

hinting that she isunfaithfulor making it an accusation will lead to terrible fights and counter-accusations.

And even if you're the cleanest in this relationship, those aren't fights you're going to enjoy.

11) Don't underestimate

On the other hand, overreaction is underreaction.

Now the thing is:

If your girlfriend is trying to make you jealous or angry, this is a pattern and toxic behavior that you need to address.

And you must not fall into their trap.

But if she flirts and talks to other guys in a way that makes you uncomfortable, don't hide it or "feel bad" for bringing it up.

Often, good and sensitive people brag about themselves, especially in relationships.

They tell themselves that they have no right to be worried or upset...

Let them have no reason to be depressed or jealous...

They tell themselves they are delusional, paranoid and out of line.

But they can't suppress the true feelings and concerns that eventually erupt in a tsunami of resentment and chaos, usually ending the relationship.

Here's my main point about it:

If you are upset and uncomfortable when your girlfriend talks to the male half of the world, let her know in a calm but clear way.

Don't make demands, just be honest. You are only fooling yourself when you try to suppress your worries.

12) Ask your friends for their opinion

Never trust others to live your life for you.

But:

Asking for and following their advice never hurt anyone.

You don't have to take the advice of your friends, but you can certainly listen to them.

Find a good friend or two and ask them what they would do if they were you. Perhaps they have been through similar situations, perhaps not.

Either way, it's always worth hearing new perspectives.

Even a point of view that you consider too aggressive or silly can make you see things in a new light.

As for a close friend who was in a similar situation, your opinion can be especially valuable.

There is no coin worth more than the lived experience.

And when you ask for advice and experiences from close friends, you can gain wisdom and insights that you might otherwise have to learn the hard way.

13) Ask your family for their opinion

Your family might not be your favorite people, but they might know you better than anyone else.

If they know your girlfriend well, even better.

But even if your family doesn't really know your girlfriend, they know you.

And they will likely give you very valuable advice on what to do and what not to do.

Sometimes those close to us have remarks about us that we overlook.

It's like looking for your glasses when you've already put them on.

Your family is the one pointing this out!

They could indicate that you are too lenient or too paranoid with your girlfriend...

They might tell you to focus on something else or go deeper...

In fact, they might laugh and let you know that the whole thing isn't even worth talking about.

See what your family has to say! you would be surprised

14) The final decision is yours

When your girlfriend talks to other guys, that's one thing.

If she's talking to other guys to cheat or looking for a relationship ejection seat, that's a whole different matter.

Ultimately, no one but you and her can make the decision to continue the relationship.

After all, it takes two to tango.

Whatever you do and talk to your girlfriend, I strongly recommend the following:

• avoid accusations
• Be reasonable
• let her explain
• Really think about your next step before taking it.

talk is easy

Talking is easy. If your girlfriend is talking to other guys, I strongly advise you not to jump to conclusions.

Even if she is flirting, don't overdo it.

Be sure to strengthen the foundations of your relationships.

Get back to the basics that brought you together and kept you together and stay away from unnecessary jealousy.

Set your limits and stick to them.

Your friend can talk as much as she wants, but make it clear to her that if this conversation is more than just a conversation, you're leaving.